


Wherever You Go (I Shall Follow)

by QueenOfNewOrleans22



Category: Guns N' Roses
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Arguing, Child Abuse, Domestic Violence, F/M, Gen, Homophobia, Hurt/Comfort, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Rape/Non-con Elements, Running Away, Self-Discovery, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Sexual Content, Suicidal Thoughts, Threats of Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-26
Updated: 2020-11-12
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:01:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27204215
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenOfNewOrleans22/pseuds/QueenOfNewOrleans22
Summary: It's a hot summer day in Lafayette, Indiana when Bill Bailey turns, and with a strange seriousness that offsets the nearly comical nature of his words, says -"Let's run away."(Jeffrey Isbell is young and nervous, but he follows his friend to L.A anyways, because he doesn't quite want to be left alone again.)(But there he meets a boy with pretty eyes and a nice smile, and, really, you don't know what you have 'till you lose it.)
Relationships: Axl Rose/Izzy Stradlin, Duff McKagan/Izzy Stradlin, Steven Adler/Slash
Comments: 22
Kudos: 13





	1. Chapter 1

It's a hot summer day in Lafayette, Indiana when Bill Bailey turns, and with a strange seriousness that offsets the nearly comical nature of his words, says - 

"Let's run away." 

For a single moment, Jeffrey Isbell is inclined to believe that his friend is joking, and he nearly believes that inclination as gospel, but Bill looks so determined and so, so serious that Jeffrey starts to get a little scared. He doesn't get scared easily, but the sight and proclamation made a chill go up his spine, like slender fingers dancing across his back. 

The sun is shining brightly, and not a single cloud could be seen in the wide expanse of blue sky. Bill and Jeffrey are sitting in a field of lightly swaying grass, bored but not quite ready to ready to return to their homes yet. Lafayette was a small town that didn't provided little entertainment for anybody that wasn't an old geezer who spent all their time on their rocking chairs, knitting and boring all the kids with tales of their childhoods. 

The two boys are sitting near the old, rusted train tracks that hadn't seen any activity from trains or conductors alike for years. It was a favorite spot of theirs simply because it was isolates and solitary, far from where any of the other kids dared step foot. 

Jeffrey frowns intensely. "Where did that come from?" He asks, unsure of how lightly he was supposed to tread with that single statement that seemed to hold the world in its hands. 

They had, after all, been sitting in relative silence for the last hour or so. 

But if there was one thing that Jeffrey had learned in his life, it was that he had to expect the unexpected, and to not be shocked whenever something came from totally out of the left-field. 

"You know where it came from." Bill says, and his temper was already beginning to shine through. There was a spark in his eyes and Jeffrey knew that, depending on what his answer might be, that spark would turn into a flame. The knowledge was both terrifying and fascinating. "I want, no, _need,_ out, Iz. I can't spend one more day in this piece of shit town before somebody either kills me or I kill myself." 

Jeffrey sighs and looks up at the sky, as if to pray to the gods to give him some sort of strength - or strike him dead on the spot. 

"Listen, you don't have to deal with the shit I do everyday, so don't you start with the old excuses." Bill continues, crossing his arms over his chest as he begins to pace across the field. He's angry, and that's never a good sign, especially during moments like these. 

" _What_ old excuses?" Jeffrey asks tiredly, beginning to listlessly pick out the grass by the roots, needing something to do with his hands. 

Bill throws his hands up in the air. "It doesn't matter!" He practically yells, and the exasperation begins to peak through, giving him a wild gaze to his eyes. "I need to leave, and you're coming with me." 

It sounds too much like an ultimatum, and Jeffrey feels a little irked that, apparently, his hand has already been dealt. He tosses the grass aside and watches at the wind catches it. "That's unfair." He mumbles, only partly fighting at this point, because he's never been an argumentative person and Bill always has been the sort of person that could convince an entirely stable person to jump off a bridge. 

Or, at least, that's what Jeffrey's experience has told him. 

"Life's unfair." Bill replies, like it's all really that simple, as if it could all be explained by those two words. The wind catches his hair, and it looks like a wildfire. 

Jeffrey looks down at his grass-stained jeans, unsure, scared, and unable to refuse. "Where are we even going to go?" He asks, but the answer was plain and right in front of his face, evidently, because when Bill gives his answer, its almost instinctive. 

"L.A!" Bill spreads his arms wide, and there's a keen desperation in his tone that makes Jeffrey feels bad for even thinking about refusing. 

They had talked about running away before, of course - during the worst of days that extended into hours and hours of misery, there was nothing to do but give a mild form of hope. They would conspire about running away to L.A and getting jobs and getting far, far away from the people in town. 

But never had it been this serious before. 

Bill looks disappointed. "What, are you a pussy? Are you afraid to leave your mommy?" He's angry, and the one person who had always stood by his side was not so sure anymore. "Go on, then! Run back home to mommy! I'll do this by myself." But even as those words slip by his lips and enter the world with baby steps, Bill is uncertain. 

He hasn't been without anybody by his side, whether it be reluctantly or not, in years. No, scratch that - Bill hasn't been without Jeffrey by his side in years, and the world doesn't seem to make sense. 

' _Who's the pussy now?'_ Bill thinks. 

Jeffrey looks down as a ladybug behind to crawl up his boot. "Okay." He signs wearily. "L.A, then." He doesn't want to leave - not really. Jeffrey doesn't want to leave his parents and brothers and the only home he's ever known, but Bill is the one person who understands, and call it pathetic, but Jeffrey suddenly cannot take being left alone. 

Before Bill, there was only solitude. 

Before Bill, there was nobody who gave a single damn about the lone person in the corner. 

And now, Jeffrey guessed that it was time for him to return that favor. 

Lafayette was small and cramped, filled with old geezers and bullies and drunks who couldn't even be bothered to look after their kids as they ran smoke around town. There was a courthouse, a college, a river, and railroad tracks. The kids who never quite got enough attention sat in fields and smoked pot, while the kids who got too much attention got straight A's and then were dead by the age of fifty because of some incurable disease. 

What was there for them here, anyways? 

Bill is staring at Jeffrey, his eyes wide and a smile beginning to tug at his lips, which remained reluctant thus far, as if he couldn't quite believe it. "Are you fucking with me?" Bill asks, and hope is dancing on the very edges like delicate glass. 

Jeffrey sighs, and allows the ladybug to crawl up on his finger. "I'm coming with you to L.A." He says softly. 

The hard, cold truth is that Jeffrey doesn't want to be alone, even though he always has felt so alone even in crowds. Bill doesn't want to be alone either, but he somehow manages to alienate everybody. 

In a strange way, they're two peas in a rotten pod. 

L.A is a place that's far, far away, and even though they're teenagers, and nearly adults, it seems almost magical. It's a place that seems to be a far cry from the boring town they've both lived in for all their lives, where everything is the same old story that keeps getting reread. 

Nobody would know them in L.A, they would just be two faces in the crowd. 

And maybe that was part of the charm and problem at the same time. 

Bill grins, and its the best goddamn thing that Jeffrey has ever seen. It makes the whole mess worth it, and hopefully it will make the ensuing hell that would surely come worth it, too. 

"You're great, man." Bill says, but then he digs into the pockets of his worn flannel jacket and pulls out his wallet. After a moment of digging, Bill unearths what appears to a hundred dollar bill, which is wrinkled and old and dirty but, hey, its something. 

Jeffrey almost is awestruck. "Where'd you get that?" He asks, and then it dawns on him. "Oh shit. You stole it, didn't you?" 

"What's wrong with that?" Bill admires the dollar with thinly veiled pride. 

"What-" Jeffrey bites back his argument and then waves it away, not wanting to bother with it anymore. Life was already stressful enough without having to get up in somebody's case because he stole money. "Never mind." It didn't matter, not for long, anyways. 

Bill nods in approval and put the dollar back in his wallet. "Now, we have to leave tonight, otherwise my stepdad will realize that I took it, 'kay?" He's nervous, and its starting to show in his voice. Normally, Bill is as calm and collected as anybody could be, but this, after all, was a huge step to take. 

Jeffrey feels his heart lurch, but doesn't say a word. 

"Pack a bag, and for the love of god, do not, _do not,_ clue off your parents." Bill continues, undaunted. He's been planning this for years, ever since his aunt had first come back from her vacation and started groaning and moaning about how wild L.A was, and how she would never go back there for as long as she would live, which was a wish that came true. 

The words just make it that much worse, because Jeffrey loves his parents, and doesn't want to leave them. They weren't the best people in the world, but they tried their best, they really did. His father lived out in Florida, but continued to contact Jeffrey and talk over the phone with him. Meanwhile, Jeffrey's mother would be stuck, alone, with his brothers. 

But then there was Bill, and his hair was as fiery as the sun, and Jeffrey had never stood a single chance. Not from that first day, and not on the last. 

"Okay." Jeffrey agrees, and he stands, allowing the ladybug to spread her wings and take off into the air, disappearing as suddenly as she'd come. Their bikes are in the distance, and with that mutual agreement, they take off walking toward them. Bill is practically running, and Jeffrey is scared, again. 

*******

When Jeffrey returns home, he packs a bag, doing as told like a dutiful little solider with everything to lose and nothing to gain. He packs light - a few changes of clothing, his toothbrush and toothpaste, a pocket knife that his father had given him, and a few books. 

Jeffrey roots through his room, and unearths as much money as he could possibly find. The money came from random jobs and pick-pocketing, loose change that would help, no matter how small. Jeffrey has two hundred dollars that he's been hiding in his sock, and as he takes the rolled-up ball out, held together by a rubber band, the reality of his agreement hits Jeffrey like a mack truck going at full speed. 

There was no going back. 

Taking a small moment in thought, Jeffrey sat down on his bed and looked around at his room. He would leave, and the room would gather dust - or maybe his mother would clean it and rent it out for hitchhikers to earn a few bucks. 

Jeffrey feels guilty for leaving her, but he cannot stay when her mouth says that, yes, she loves him, but her eyes say, ' _I don't understand you'._

*******

When night falls - and it does quickly - they make their move. 

Bill is the unspoken leader, even though there's only two of them. He has a backpack slung over his shoulder and a fire in his eyes from the spark that'd been ignited earlier. "Are you ready?" He asks, and it's not a question. 

Meanwhile, Jeffrey is nervous, and he can feel the wind as it runs through his hair and drives thin needles into his bare skin. He cannot stop shivering. "Yeah." He says, even though he cannot quite find the truth. 

It's cold and dark and windy, and everything blends together like a maze, built just for them. Coyotes stalk and prowl the outer limits of the town, and there's also worry that the sheriff had left town earlier that day and would drive back and spot them. But along with the nervousness and anxiety is determination and resilience, and it would work, Bill just knew it. 

They were gonna cut through the corn fields and emerge on the other side, using their bikes to travel along highways and towns and cities. They would hitchhike only if needed, and pray that whoever gave mercy upon them had a place for their bikes. 

Bill and Jeffrey were young, but their eyes told stories. 

And they weren't pretty ones, either. 

"Okay." Bill pauses, and he takes a deep breathe. "Let's do this." 

They don't have a plan, and only three hundred dollars are split between them. 

"Yeah." Jeffrey throws up a quick prayer to whoever was listening. 

This wasn't gonna end well.


	2. Chapter 2

"Maybe we should've stolen a car." 

Life was full of _maybe's_ and _should've's,_ possibilities that never came to life and ideas that never came to form. 

"Yeah." 

It was also full of roadblocks, and moments of fleeting agreement that you would later come to regret. 

Jeffrey didn't regret it, per say, but as the sky turned to a deep, inky black, and as the whimpers became howls, it was easy to wish that he was back in bed, safe but maybe not sound, because there was nothing that would've stopped him from worrying endlessly about his friend, who would be biking, alone, along a stretch of highway that probably hadn't seen a vistor since the sixties. 

The bitter chill of the night was beginning to even get to Bill, who has started out strong but had then graduated to cursing and muttering as they made their way down to a place that, for any of their knowledge, might as well be Russia. 

Bill paused, leaned to the side so he could put one of his feet on the ground and steady himself, and took a few deep breaths. "Fuck." He muttered, panting slightly as he glanced at his watch. It'd only been two hours, yet they both felt as if they'd been at it for days. 

This was partly because neither of them were very athletic, and had never biked so far, nor for so long. 

"Um.." Jeffrey looked out into the cornfields that stood to one side. "Do you hear that?" He squinted, struggling to see with the darkness shadowing every figure that might appear. 

"Hear what?" Bill said, but just as those words left his lips, a howl echoed in the silent air. The corn stalks rustled in warning. Realization sparked in Bill's eyes, and he fumbled for his flashlight. 

Jeffrey watched as his friend hurriedly flicked the flashlight on and shined it, piercing through the thick veil of black. Coyotes were opportunistic little bastards, but they were shy and rather dodgy, and likely not a huge threat. 

With that being said, an animal with no other choices would get bold, and even two boys who a coyote might've avoided before would look mighty tasty if they hadn't eaten in a while. 

The corn stalks stilled. 

And Jeffrey, who didn't like chances, grabbed his pocket knife, which was in an inner pocket of his jacket. He didn't know if it would do any good, but was willing to assume so. It was, after all, their only weapon. 

"Wolves don't live here, do they?" Bill said, his voice becoming slightly higher in pitch due to the anxiety creeping up on him without warning. He shined the flashlight onto the stalks, awaiting to see a coyote emerge from the darkness with a warning snarl. 

Jeffrey shook his head, reaching out and grabbing Bill's shoulder. "We should go."

They could go faster than a coyote, right? Jeffrey wasn't sure, but he wanted to leave, and put as much distance as he could between Lafayette and them as humanely possible. 

Their parents would notice soon, after all. 

And it made Jeffrey shiver with the thought, knowing that nobody would react well to seeing that their children had made a run for it. 

Something sparked in Bill's eyes. "Yeah." He agreed breathlessly, probably remembering his stepfather, and realizing how dangerous it was to just linger so close to the town limits. 

They started biking again. 

Jeffrey was faster because he had longer legs, but he slowed down in order to keep alongside with Bill. There was a superstitious fear, lingering in his mind, that if they weren't close by each other, then one of them would disappear. Jeffrey didn't want to be alone, not because of the dark, but because Bill was the person whom he was doing this for. If not for that single statement, Jeffrey would be in bed, not biking in the lonely night. 

They'd been friends for years, ever since Jeffrey had first seen Bill running away from the teachers on that one fateful day. After that, seemingly united in their combined loneliness, the two loners had become friends. Bill was an outspoken, loud mouthed kid, the sort who got into fights every other day, while Jeffrey was quiet and shy, the sort who disappeared into the shadows. 

But they clicked - two polar opposites with simultaneously troubled lives. 

"Do you think they've noticed yet?" Bill spoke, breaking the silence. His long, red hair was like a signal in the darkness, which allowed Jeffrey to easily keep up beside him. However, that meant they could be seen more easily, and that made the whole situation much clearer. 

Jeffrey shrugged. "Probably not. It's still too early." Or so he assumed. 

For a moment, Bill glanced at Jeffrey, and then looked back in front of them so that he didn't crash into something. "They ain't gonna give a shit when they do find out we're gone." Bill said, and his tone was dark, tinged with an overhanging of anger. He angrily tossed his head back so that his hair wasn't in his face anymore. "They're gonna go - 'oh, good, at least they're out of our lives'. 'Probably won't even report us missing." 

Jeffrey didn't even bother trying to dissuade that assertion, and only looked toward the cornstalks. He would've liked to think that his parents would care for him, or maybe his brothers, but Jeffrey knew that they would mostly be relieved underneath the concern. Life was hard enough with two kids, but three? Jeffrey knew that they would have a better time paying the bills, paying for food and clothes, without having to care for him, too. 

"Bon voyage!" Bill made a waving motion. "Ah, fuck 'em all. L.A will be much better, since nobody will know us there." He shook his head. 

The next hour or so was spent in relative silence, but with that in mind, the sun was beginning to peak up beyond the horizon. Soon enough, their parents would go to wake them up for school, but find empty beds. Jeffrey had almost left a note to explain his disappearance, but hadn't. He didn't want to leave any clues, and didn't want to disappoint Bill by giving his parents one last goodbye that would later lead to their discovery. 

That was what terrified Jeffrey most, even though he pretended like it didn't bother him - disappointment, especially when it came from Bill, who had a special way of making somebody feel like the smallest person in the world. It used to annoy Jeffrey, but now, he just hated it. 

"What are we going to do once we reach L.A?" Jeffrey asked, leaning foward to propel himself faster. His legs were beginning to ache with how much they'd been pedaling, and it'd only been a few hours. A part of Jeffrey wanted to know why there hadn't been more preparation, but didn't. He didn't want to cause a fight, especially when there was nowhere to run. Jeffrey was a runner - he couldn't handle conflict. 

Bill sighed and looked out into the distance. "We need to new names. Once we get there, it'll be too risky to just go by our real ones." He said with a tone of great determination. 

"Oh." Jeffrey frowned. "Like what?" He asked. 

If Bill wasn't so busy trying to pedal his bike, he would've tossed his hands up in the air with sheer frustration. "I don't know! Why are you always expecting me to have the answers? Just use your brain for once!" His voice rose like the wind in the air, sharp and piercing and loud - _too loud._

It was at that same second that something large ran out from the fields, a dark shape on four legs that seemed to come from out of nowhere and narrowly avoid getting ran over. 

Jeffrey, startled, jolted badly enough in fright that he accidentally steered far too much toward the right, and he yelped as he fell off his bike and into the darkened cornfield. Jeffrey could feel the needles in his arms as he tumbled headfirst, and sparks of light danced in the darkness. 

For a moment, Jeffrey was in a freefall, and then he connected with the ground. 

And darkness. 

The first thing that registered in Jeffrey's mind was sharp, terrible pain, and a vague dizziness. He spat out the dirt that had somehow made its way into his mouth, coughing at the taste. All he could see for a moment was the dark sky as it began to turn colors in approaching morning, and then a familiar face filled his vision.

"Oh, thank god. Thank god. You were just unconscious and I didn't - are you okay?" Bill looked down, and his face paled significantly. "Holy fuck." He moaned. 

Jeffrey blinked, still dazed. "Wha-" He managed to lift his head off the ground and look down at his right arm, which, as he began to realize, was where that pain was coming from, and something was clearly wrong with it. 

To be more specific, the bone was pressing against the skin, and threatening to break free. It certainly explained why there was such pain radiating from there, since Jeffrey knew that the pain was similar to that one time that one kid had sprained his wrist during recess, except so much worse. 

"Oh." Jeffrey said with remarkable calmness. "Well, that's bad." 

Bill's eyes widened until they were practically like saucers. "Bad? _Bad? Are you fucking kidding me?_ You asshole." He looked up toward the sky, as if begging God for some sort of help. 

Except they both knew that none would be forthcoming.


End file.
